Yeahhh, that's definitely a new one.Good one..
I can only pity those people who assemble to hear him, if these are his HOLY, so-called godly views !
This self-proclaimed dogman, sorry godman seems to be a wolf masquerading as a godman. What else explains his sickening views on the rape and murder of the 23 year old Delhi girl.
Those who claim to be his followers should be ashamed of themselves.Now that they have understood what he really is, they should do some soul- searching and don't encourage him further by continuing to support him.
These views are not only strange, pathetic, ignorant and outright condemnable, but also clearly betrays a sadistic, merciless and valueless personality.
The next time this man tries to talk to them - the minimum his followers can do, for the dignity of our Nation and our fellow human beings, is to ask him to - just shut up & get lost !!
I am just joking folks - he is not an idiot, he is a genius.He is a legend.He is a Modern Bapu. He is a blah blah and bhah. He is always blah blah and will continue to be blah blah and blah. His blah blah and blah is more sweeter than that of the RSS Chief Mr.Mohan's shit. In one word, he is a 'great' blah blahian.
Afterall, we are seeing more and more people, be it politicians or so-called cultural guardians or whoever, coming out with such stellar performances!
Now to set the context of this blog post, this is what happened :
Addressing his followers in Rajasthan, Mr.Modern Bread Bapu said that when the girl encountered six drunk men on the bus in Delhi last month, "she should have taken God's name and held the hand of one of the men and declared him her brother." He went on to say, "Galti ek taraf se nahi hoti hai (no mistake can be one-sided)"
The icing on the cake is - a girl who is getting raped by some one should declare him as her "brother"..
On hearing the word 'brother', that drunk person's heart will melt like an 'ice cream on fire' and after that he will start crying, calling the girl as 'Sisterrrrrr.....'.
There will be lot of emotional roller-coaster scenes after that, with background music, ala an old melodramatic Hindi film.
So the main points girls should note down is (as per Asaram Technique):
1.Take God's name (You can even take Mr.Asaram Bapu's name.After all he is the dogman, sorry again, I meant the godman).
2.Take a Rakhi with you always, so that you can tie it on would-be-rapist and declare 'brotherrrrrrrrrrrrrr...' and apply breaks!
3.Take a separate wallet with you, so that when the 'brotherrrr..' starts crying, you can give the wallet to him, so that he can wipe his tears.
4.Make sure that the 'brotherrrr..' does not cry tooo much, else he could get fever, head-ache and cold. His parents might scold you! Also, the poor fellow should not suffer just because he tried to rape you.Be kind to him, you know!
5.Invite him to your house and introduce him to your parents and other family members as your 'brotherrrrrrrrrrrrrr...'.
Not sure why this "asaram" technique was not in use till now..
If you ask me, I would blame Mr.Asa ram also in equal terms for all the rapes that happened all through these years (post his supreme birth).
Where was he till now??
Why is he revealing this technique only now??
If he had revealed about this earlier, many girls could have escaped, and then we could have had "All Indians are my 'brothers' and sisters!"
His followers should question him..Why, why - Mr.Asaram, why this Kolaveri delay di???
Shame on you Mr.Asaram, for not coming out with your technique (formula, theory, invention, discovery, mechanism, idea, airtel, bsnl - whatever it's called), early..
EARLY is the super word here - not idea or airtel or bsnl..
And since you willingly did not stop all the rapes that happened, by not revealing your bsnl, you should be charged with rape and murder and given appropriate punishment - isn't it???
Mean while the Indian government should take this Asaram technique to the UN and get all member nations educated on this technique that can save girls all over the world from rape..
The next Nobel peace prize should most obviously belong to no one else, it should belong only to Mr. Asaram Bapu.(If the Nobel committee has already finalized on some one else, let's try and bribe them.Let's use a portion of our black money stashed abroad for this.Let Mr.Suresh Kalmadi be given this task)
After Mr.Asaram's death, his brain should be donated to medical students or to NASA scientists(Americans will surely put pressure on the Indian government for this) - let them explore his brain and check if there are more such brilliant pearls sleeping inside, eagerly waiting to jump out and entertain us..
After all such magical ideas are pulled-out, his brain should be kept in some zoo, sorry again, in a museum, I meant..
Finally, the dream is for a rape-less 'Asaram World', where-in any girl under duress will pick-up the hand of her tormentor and declare 'brotherrrrrrrrrrrrrr...' and escapes..
Copyrights Reserved & Courtesy : Bapu, Asaram Bapu (ala Bond, James Bond!).
Hoping and praying for more similar Asaram Bapu-isms from The Holy Shit, His Highness Asaram Bapu..
We are living in exciting times..
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